The Falling

I have spent
my whole life
being told
I am too much
of everything
by people who
have only known
how to live
in mediocrity.

* * *

It is not hard
to love me,
it is hard
to look at
every scar
every wound
every tear
and then
to love me.

* * *

These days even falling stars
hide themselves from
eyes closed and
palms held together
in hope that
they will make those
wishes come true
that have been
living in a heart
stuck on
the idea of forever.

* * *

He tells me that
my smile is beautiful
and my eyes
shine brighter than the stars
he mentions
the colour of my hair
the softness of my skin
the scarcity of visible scars
but he does not notice
a whole universe hidden
deep within me,
and that is how I know.

* * *

And the next time you ask
me whether I am okay
I will not lie and say yes
I will not bottle up those tears
behind a smile that never
reaches my eyes
instead
I will shake my head
and curl up into a ball
I will let my emotions paint my
face and I will let my heart weep
and I will let you
come to me then
I will let you hold me in
a tight embrace
the way you always
do in my head.