How’s My Coal

by Simon Barraclough

How’s my coal getting on?
I set as much aside for you as I could.
Don’t use it all up at once.
It might come in handy one day.

How’s my oil faring?
It keeps best underground, in the dark.
Doesn’t do so well in the light.
Don’t let it spoil.

How’s the wind blowing?
I try to keep it moving,
keep it on the muscle,
keep the pressure on, make it hustle.

How’s the hydro hanging?
All that potential.
You don’t oughta de-water: watch out for insects, birdlife.
You’re dammed if you do and you’re dammed if you don’t.

Any breaking news on wave power?
I’ve hired an intern to handle the oceans.
If we could make some ripples, get more converts,
that would be swell.

Geothermal sounds like a blast.
I’ve got files and files on extremophiles.
Plucky geezers. There’s life in the oven and life in the freezer.
I’ll keep the volcanoes ticking over for you.

Nuclear’s nothing new
but until some of you stop
saying nucular
I’m not sure it’ll do.

Hydrogen: now that’s my bag.
People say I’m full of it
but one day you’ll get a grip,
stick with it: there’s more than one way to fuse a cat.

You’ve got to get off-grid, kids.
One day I’ll blow the lid off.
Your magnetosphere’s too tempting for me,
like bubble wrap I’ve gotta pop.

I assume you’re using solar, right?
This other stuff ’s for backup.
In case there’s a rainy day
for me, in space.

Talking of which,
one day you’ll sail away
on a fair wind of photons.
Remember me this way.

Last updated October 27, 2022